May in pictures

I’ve been only part-time employed for a whole month. Not to start this on a downer, but I just realized it, cropping this picture. Dang.

Unemployment is a strange thing. I don’t know how people are surviving it without God. I never would have thought it could be like this, and I’m sure I won’t be able to explain it if you’ve never experienced it. On the one hand, it’s nice to not go to a job I hate every day. On the other hand, the bills are still coming in, so I feel guilty for relaxing even for a second. And – more than any of that – is the persistent chorus that you’re not good enough. For anything. Resume after resume and email after email, application after application and phone call after phone call. You occasionally get excited about one that looks really good, but the silence on the other end is deafening.

But on the bright side, I did get to do some office work for a woman I know for a few days. The Lord used some old friends to really bless us financially and keep the mortgage afloat this month, which was so awesome.

Being unemployed has also been an amazing proving ground for my faith. If you have a great opportunity that conflicts with the ministry that you know you’re called to, which will you choose? (It didn’t come to that, thank God, but I still had to decide within myself.) If you get a small, token job, will you leave it if He tells you to, and look like a fool to the world? Ugh.

Best news for May (although the photo is not in the above crop) is that we paid off the Ford! I take a deep breath and smile every time I think about it. No more car payments. We have my college loan we’re still paying off, but that’s it. And the Ford was a big car payment, so that’s a few hundred dollars back that we really need every month. Couldn’t have come at a better time. Ahhh.

So even though I still didn’t do a great job of photographing May, I think this one’s going to be my fav for May: